Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Britney Says, "Give Me a Break"

The pop princess told reporters that she is NOT pregnant! She told the public she wasn't pregnant and that she had just had a baby 7 months ago so to give her a break. I didn't realize it was seven months ago, Brit it's time to lose the baby weight! This came after numerous rumors of a "baby bump" and her mysterious trip to the hospital after complaining of stomach cramps. Well...I think it is safe to say we all dodged the bullet on this one, I also believe that she isn't pregnant because Britney would be creaming it from the hilltops if she were in fact pregnant with another Federspawn! And these pictures of her in New Orleans for Mardi Gras show her looking not so pregnant!

Oh No!!!

After writing all the positive stuff about "The Bachelor", it breaks my heart to say this, but Brody Jenner and Kristin Cavallari have called it quits. Looks like the two are DUN-ZO :( This is just heart breaking seeing as Kristin told TEEN PEOPLE that this was her first "real love" Oh well. She is only 19 we are guaranteed to see her with a lot more men before she settles down for real. The first whisperings of a split came when the two did not going on their Valentines Day trip as scheduled and Kristin told people that she was spending Valentines Day (and consequently, her birthday) alone. The next whisperings came when Brody took Kristin off his "TOP EIGHT" on MySpace. (mature move on his part) And then again when he deleted her from his friends altogether and took down pictures of her.

Why they split after looking so adorable and cozy together? No word as of yet, but I'm sure we will hear soon enough.

With this spilt AND the cancellation of her show...Not to mention the air date of her Veronica Mars episode being pushed back...Will Kristin disappear from the Hollywood Spotlight altogether? Have no fear, I won't let that happen I will continue posting and making a semi-celebrity out of her until I have nothing left. I got your back Kris!

It's Spring Time in Paris!

Ok...It isn't spring time YET, but I have failed to let you all know that I have been obsessing over The Bachelor Paris for the past few weeks. So I digress. I was a little upset when Travis sent Susan home, but really only because I wanted to see Susan's mom sell her out a little more. I mean really how does a mother sell their daughter down the river like that?! Regardless even though I thought she was the prettiest out of the bunch I think Travis made the right decision when giving her the boot. I also think, although she might not agree, that getting kicked off probably will help her "acting career" seeing as we were able to see her "true range".

Ok no moving forward a little more. The reunion was AWESOME although I really wish that Ali G. Was there for more reasons other than I think its funny to hear them call her Ali G. (She is certainly no Sacha Baron Cohen) But more so because I really wanted a "clock-ticking" experience with her again! More importantly though, as much as I agree with Susan going home the week before I do not agree with the way everyone was attacking her. I think that the one girl that was ripping into her (Jennifer, Ali?? I can't remember who it was) was so mean and so wrong. I think it was a little bit of a case of jealousy because the girls were never happy that she had made it so far. I think that she might have been there for the right reasons, and that she might have developed feelings, but I agree with the fact that possibly it wasn't a lasting "feeling" that she had. I liked how all the girls said they saw the "softer side of Moana", but personally I still think she is fake.

Now...Real time comments! I am SOOOOOOOOO HAPPY that Travis picked Sarah. He had me a little worried at the end until right before the last commercial break when he said, "truth be told I know who I am going to pick and I know it is the right choice." Right then and there I knew it was my girl Sarah! Although we have only seen one marriage come out of The Bachelor, I think this love might be real, and I'm pretty sure these two will be in it for the long run. (Just for the record I liked Trista and Ryan, but I think Trista puts on an act for the public and their "on-screen" love might be a little fake)

Moana didn't look so shocked to me, and her tears were KILLING me. All she did was cry throughout the entire episode. Travis kept saying that she is a very emotional girl...Yeah emotionally UNSTABLE! I think that nothing she has said over the entire season was real. I feel as though she made a real effort to look "softer", but all in all, I didn't see them being together. There was just something about the way she said, "I want to leave with my man" that sealed the deal for me and I knew that their relationship was too casual and would never end up standing the tests of time.

Now...I cannot WAIT to find out if Sarah and Travis make it! They are so cute and she really brought out the positive qualities in him! SOOOOOOOOOOO CUTE! Listen...I was in the Greek system, I know fake...And this is real :) Cross my heart!


oh and P.S. I know the show made him do the final rose ceremony the way he did. By saying all these possitve things and then, "But". But MAN WAS THAT HARSH! And then when he said "But" to Sarah, I almost DIED!!

Monday, February 27, 2006

What To Do In The Event of a Terrorist Attack

If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about a cool design for a new tattoo.

Look people...This is some serious stuff! In a world where children no longer are scared of the imaginary monsters under their bed, but the real ones that co-habitat with us everyday the world can be a very scary place. Thanks to many terror alerts, and the National Threat level that seems to alleviate nothing more than our anxiety people are scared everyday. We live in a world now where we need to be suspicious of everyone and everything around us. Even children are taught these things at a young age which unfortunately only cause racial and ethnic profiling to become a stronger mode of "finding" the bad people. The more we teach it, the more ingrained it will become, but unfortunately it is the world we now live in.

However, what is life when you are cowering in a corner and refusing to talk to people because you are scared of them? That's not life...That's letting terrorism win...So although this is a serious matter..Why not have a little laugh about it to alleviate some of the fears that we must live with day in and day out!

The government has come up with a new site to help let us know what to do in the event of a terrorist attack, but like most road signs and most warning signs it is hard to tell EXACTLY wha these vague pictures mean. So someone has spoofed the new US Government Website just to give us a little laugh in an otherwise pretty scary world! Check it out...it's really hilarious!

(Thanks Mike!!)
I Bet Mike Wishes He Were Invited to THIS Slumber Party!

Emma Roberts (who I personally love and although I am WAY to old to be watching Nick I fully admit to watching Unfabulous!), JoJo (My friend Mike's imaginary Girlfriend!), and Sarah Paxton get together on Extra for a slumber party promoting their new film Aquamarine!

Um...I'm not gonna lie, I kinda wanna see it! (I know ONE person that would go with me!!!) And I DID just see Curious George...At least this movie is for Tweens and Teens! :)

Will The Sex Pistols Attend the Hall of Fame Ceremony?

Looks like they wont be attending seeing as they were reported stating that going to the ceremony would be like, "Mixing urine with wine!" Well...At least they weren't sugar coating it! Fabulous Quote!

Yep...I see the resemblance!

So it looks as though we will all be graced with a shit load of humor next year! Paris Hilton WILL be portraying Mother Teresa in T Rajeevnath's film. Um...This is a joke right?

According to Digital Spy it looks as though it isn't a joke and Paris was reported saying, "It's such an honour. I'm so excited. I really want to learn more about this amazing woman, so that's what I'm doing in a few months."

Um....She is going to learn? That might be more impractical than thinking she can act. Please someone tell me this is all a joke, because I cannot think of a worse fit for a role EVER! Bill Pullman would be a better fit!!! :)

NO words are needed for this one...Just enjoy Charlie/Jack :)

Friday, February 24, 2006

And This is EXACTLY What I'm Talking About..

See not too bad Not too bad again..

Then.....BAM! Hit me (with the ugly stick) baby one more time!


Can We Just Discuss...

That the "Maybe Pregnant" Britney Spears looks fan-freaking-tastic on Will and Grace! She must be pregnant you're body can't change that much that quickly! She is so confusing, if she gets such positive feedback when she is looking good, how come she looks a mess the next day?

GASP! Could it be that she DOESN'T CARE WHAT WE THINK?!!! Oh no way! Anyways she looks hot here!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Oh Hell NO!

Jessica Simpson and Kevin Federline?! Please don't let this be true...PLEASE! While Britney was at home with the baby it looks as though Kevin was out at Privilege in LA HITTING on Jessica! WHAT?! Life and Style reported that the two looked pretty comfortable together. Reps for both Jessica and Kevin said that the two are just "old friends" and it was nothing more than that!

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Just because Nick refuses to go back to you, and just because a couple of musicians have reportedly turned you down it does NOT mean that you don't have options anymore. Jessica, Jessica, Jessica, there is NO reason for you to climb that far down the ladder! Just be happy being single for a while and I PROMISE someone with more promise will come along there is NO reason to settle! (NICK TAKE HER BACK PLEASE! You two can work it out!)

House Looks Like Osama?!

Twins?? You tell me!!

Hugh Laurie told Contact Music that he was surprised that he landed the role of Dr. House on the hit show House because he felt as though he looked like Osama Bin Laden. He said that while filming Flight of the Phoenix he became so run down that he resembled the terrorist. "My audition tape was probably the most bizarre thing any producer has ever seen; it was my Osama Bin Laden moment. I looked like I'd just crawled out of my cave."

He kinda acts like a terrorist sometimes...Somehow I find it a little unbelievable that a babe like Hugh could end up looking like a terrorist!

Mystery Mistress Revealed!

And it isn't K-Fed's cousin slash sister slash lover!!

According to OHNOTHEYDIDNT, it seems as though the lovely (I mean fugly) lady in the pictures with Kevin is a French actress/model named Sandy Lakdar. "as I understand it she is trouble and a horrible star fu*ker. She also has a horrific coke problem."

Awesome...Great girl to hang around with, well at least she is closer to your league than Britney was! (Even though even SHE is out of your league Kevin!!)

Here is her MySpace page: Sandy Lakdar's MySpace
her IMDB page: Sandy Lakdar's IMDB
and her official webpage: Sandy's Webpage


Lindsay Gets Around!!

Either Lindsay is a superhero (we shall call her Super Ho) Or people don't know what they are talking about. But it sometimes does seem as though she is making up for lost time maybe?! Supposedly Lindsay Lohan has now ALSO hooked up with Jonathan Rhys Myers. The two were spotted getting out the same car in front of The Spotted Pig in NYC where the proceeded to the VIP section of the club to get some privacy! Ooooooooo! Later the two were spotted leaving together and getting into the same car! Super Ho strikes again! I guess her fabricated relationship with Joaquin is over! (Doesn't Jonathan have a gf?! Who am I kidding, that doesn't much matter in hollywood!!)

Shaun White is a Player!!

Apparently Shaun White and Lindsay Lohan might have gotten busy, while all the while he was harboring feelings for Sasha Cohen! Oooooooo so scandalous!!

Shaun and Linds reportedly spent an "intimate" night together at Lindsay's favorite hot spot Bungalow 8. He statement, "Her and I ended up meeting up at the famous Bungalow 8. It was a good time. It was a trip. Coming home from Italy, everybody's been running up to me, saying how proud they are. It's been crazy and so I had to get some time to have fun."

Hmmm...Did they didn't they? Well regardless, Shaun told Maria on Entertainment Tonight that he has a little crush on Sasha Cohen. He would love to meet her, but he left Italy before he got the chance. Well Shaun keep trying it could happen, you never know.

Do I think Linds and The Flying tomato got it on?! No. Sorry Shaun I just don't think you pulled this trick off!
Want a boys take on the hook-up? Read it at Taylor Bunts!

I Don't Even Want to Post This

But I feel it is my duty to bring you the gossip so here it goes. My boyfriend Jake is cheating on me...Or at least so it seems. When at the BAFTA ceremony Jake asked a California cutie (I know she isn't REALLY from California!) for a bit of her time...During this time the already taken beauty and Jake exchanged numbers and he was seen doing a victory dance after the exchange. Who is the beautiful girl that is looking to sweep my man off my feet and away from me?? None other than the already taken by a gross musician Mischa Barton!

Ugh Mischa...GET OFF MY BOYFRIEND! There it is...So now you all know, Jake is a cheating bastard! In the words of Kristin Cav, "I don't wanna talk about it, I don't wanna talk about it!"

Britney Preggers Again??

According to Perez Hilton, it looks as though we might soon be seeing another little Federspawn! Despite rumors of a break up it looks as though the two may have conceived yet another child that I'm sure Kevin will refuse to pay child support for after the two divorce! Perez has heard from reliable sources that the blonde (former) babe might be pacing on the extra pounds not because of cheetoo consumption, but instead because she very well might be pregnant again.

These claims come from both a friend telling InStyle magazine that they Pop Tart is pregnant, the fact that the costume department of Will and Grace had to "fit" her accordingly for a costume on her recent guest appearance, and the fact that she has been spotted in Maui wearing a black (read: sliming) bathing suit and sporting some extra weight in the stomach area. She also has reportedly been rushed to the hospital with "stomach cramps" which might also be due to a baby on board. Well....Whether it is true or not is up to you to decide (oh and Britney's doctors!) But here is all the info you ever wanted to know on Britney's womb, enjoy!!

American Idol!!!!

Woooooohoooooo! Who is addicted due to NOTHING ELSE being on the air?! I am, I am!! This mornings Post-mortem of American Idol will be a little unconventional. It will consist of an IM conversation that Ben from Taylor Bunts and I had...Because even a sports guys needs to indulge in the Idol every once in a while! (He is the one that FORCES AI on me!!)

BitchinBeth: Taylor's parents are like the same age as him...Creepy!!!!!

benattaylorbunts: Taylor is a star and that Stevie Wonder guy looks like a muppet!

BitchinBeth: Ummm...Ok, well Bobby Bennett scares me a little bit, his rendition of Copa cabana, probably not the best idea...It DEFINITELY did not show case his talents or his range of singing!!

BitchinBeth: He shall be what? I can't really understand Tay so well!

benattaylorbunts: Are you kidding..He shall be Levon that's his name.

BitchinBeth: I thought his name was Jesus?

benattaylorbunts: No that's just what he called him, haven't you ever heard the song?

BitchinBeth: No...Isn't it a little pretentious to call your son Jesus? Isn't that like calling yourself God....Wait...Is this song sung by Kanye originally?! Regardless Taylor is insane

benattaylorbunts: No Beth, he isn't insane he is a star! I'll tell you why...When everyone else finishes their song they get all quite, but not Taylor, when he is finished with his song he screams into the mic and jumps around.

BitchinBeth: Yeah...Ben, just because you jump around doesn't make you a star, actually it probably makes you more of a candidate for an insane asylum instead!

benattaylorbunts: Ok ok...And by the way, who picks Copa cabana to sing on Idol?!

Now it's your turn, what did you think of it?

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

And it's all a waste of time! Um....Who on earth, I mean aside from Scott Stapp and Kid Rock would be buying this tape?! Yeah...Great waste of our legal systems time...Thanks Kid!

So I have been fighting posting these pictures for a couple of days, but this is it, I cannot fight it anymore I just need to come to the realization that Ryan will never be mine and that Rachel and Ryan really are so cute together! :) So without further ado Rachel and Ryan at BAFTA.

You are really really making it hard for me to defend your sexuality! Okay...I'm only kidding this is only a picture of Tom Ford getting Jake ready for a Vanity Fair shoot...But isn't it funny how we can easily make something so innocent look so bad! :)

Paris Hits a New High in the Whore Challenge

If being a dumb slut were a game Paris would be MVP! While out partying at Tao, Paris forgot Miss Manners rule #1: When wearing a dress keep your legs together.

Apparently Paris decided it would be a much better idea to show the world all her stuff, because lets be honest, she couldn't take home EVERY guy at that party and she needed to let them at least get a peek. Poor Paris...Who will marry her when she is giving it all away for free?!

P.S. How funny are the four guys just blatantly staring at Paris' no-no areas?! And she is so dumb that she probably thinks they are just looking at her because she is famous or hot.

Paris...Spreading your legs for every man at the party...That's NOT hot!

Um...Kevin? Who is this?!

It isn't Britney! While in Hawaii Kevin seems to be taking a little break from his pop star wife to hang out with some other blonde chic...Who might I add...Not cute! I hope this isn't true, because if it is I will only be forced to say, "I TOLD YOU SO BRITNEY!!"


Tuesday, February 21, 2006

I Have a Confession To Make

No I don't steal pens from my job, mainly because they don't give us any, it every man for himself in my office! No my confession is much more serious than this. No...I didn't kill anyone either just in case you were picking up your telephones ready to dial 911 or America's Most Wanted. What is my confession? I have NEVER been an American Idol fan....NEVER!!

I know..How can someone like me? So obsessed with pop culture and reality TV not like American Idol? Well, I can't really answer that question, maybe it was because I just never got into it, or maybe it was because I was too excited for Paradise Hotel to come on afterwards that I couldn't focus on it...I don't know the exact reason, but I do know that until this year I had never really watched anything Idol besides the auditions, and even that got to be a little too much for me to handle after a while. But this year Fox has done something pretty smart. (Which they might have done every year, but since I never watched I wouldn't know!) They started American Idol when NOTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD was on TV!! And when I say nothing, I literally mean nothing, not even my trusty CBS could carry me through on Tuesday's anymore seeing as I am not an NCIS fan whatsoever! So what happened? I have fallen to the feet of American Idol, I have accepted defeat and the last couple of weeks I have been tuning in (without admitting it to anyone), but now it is time to come clean.

I am PRAYING everyday that nothing will come on on Tuesday's after February sweeps are over because if something good comes on I am going to have some serious commitment issues here! Now...I already know I cannot commit to tomorrow's show unless Veronica Mars is a repeat (but I know it isn't) and I'm semi-freaking out! Who am I? What have I become?! And why did I give in and watch today? Because my friend Ben from Taylor Bunts told me to watch so we would have something to talk about tomorrow....DAMNIT BEN! What am I going to do??

Well...At least I got it out, and now if ya'll want to discuss American Idol, I'm here for you! P.S. I like EVERYONE!! It is so hard to come up with a favorite so far! WHO AM I?!! (I like Kellie Pickler 'cause she is so darn cute! And I LOVE LOVE LOVE Paris Bennett...I mean, but yeah I haven't watched carefully enough to have a favorite at all! ;) )
Britney Makes Another Dumb Move...

And TMZ makes sure to mock it! Apparently the warnings that are posted right on the gas pump to not use cell phones while pumping gas because of the danger of an explosion do NOT apply to Britney and Kevin. Not sooooo smart!! I hope Sean isn't in the car :(

SWEET Farmers Tan Tom

I have nothing else to say other than YUUUUUUUUUCK! I guess they haven't split up seeing as Katie is in Australia with him!!

What is That on Your head?!

LC and Jason were seen together at a fashion show in Bryant Park, it's nice to see that LC is following her dream to work in fashion and she is being able to accomplish it. Now what Jason was trying to accomplish with that hair I'm not too sure...He might want to cut that off and start on a new dream! :)


Kristin and Versace Sitting in a Tree

Kristin better hope that the public's love affair with her doesn't end anytime soon because it seems as though UPN's love affair with her is long over. Kristin's show "Let's Get This Party Started" is already Dun-zo! It looks as though no one seemed to interested in watching the show and the ratings for her last show were the lowest ever. In all fairness though her last show aired on February 14th, which is not only Valentine's Day cutting half of her target audience in half, but it was also the day of her birthday...Whoops there goes the rest of her target audience, they were probably all out with her! Oh well...It was good while it lasted, but don't forget to catch her on Veronica Mars on March 8th where she will play a lesbian cheerleader fearful that her secret sexual orientation will be brought to life!
Daniel Craig Loses Two Teeth

Now...Would the REAL James Bond have had to go to a doctor after losing two teeth when throwing a terrorist out the window? The answer is no, and do you know why? Because James Bond wouldn't have lost two teeth when throwing a terrorist out of the window, because James Bond has skills and he is suave and debonair...James Bond does NOT break his teeth.

However, Daniel Craig does, and he lost two of them after a stunt while filming Casino Royale. Poooooor Danny! :(

But have no fear, the producer doesn't mess around and had Daniel's personal dentist flown in to have the cutie's teeth fixed up right! In other James Bond news, Eva Green is the new bond girl, so now we can stop hearing rumors about who is going to be the new bond girl! Not Jessica Simpson, not Rachel McAdams, it's Eva Green!

Nick Asks For Spousal Support

And Jamie Foxx doesn't respect that! Jamie Foxx told interviewers that asking for money from your wife is not something that a "real man does". "A real man don't do those kind of things," Foxx bluntly stated to ET. "I don't really agree with that because I think it's a cop-out. You got to get up and do your own thing."

Hmm...How do I feel about this asking for spousal support? Well, you have to think of it this way, he basically married Jessica and they went in to many contracts with The Newlyweds, her Dessert Line of cosmetics and much more. His band 98 degrees never really made it all that big so I'm sure the money for that has long run out. He does have a new single out, but lets be honest, it's not going to be a huge money maker. So what does he have to lose by asking for money from his wife? No one really respects him as a real man anyways, so why not!

Nick go for it! And if you get the money and then want to take care of a woman, my phone line is always open!

Real World Start in 7 Days....

And may I say, it looks COMPLETELY scandalous and dramatic! I cannot wait! While you and I both wait though we can reminisce on Real World's Past. Remember Mallory from Real World Paris who was in love with Ace, but never gave us anything really too interesting to watch with him? Well...Now we get to see a whole lot more of her than we ever had a chance on MTV as she poses for Sports Illustrated. Little Mallory all grown up!