Oh Chris...You're So Hot!
So Becca and I haven't spoken in FOREVER...Mainly because I am a terrible friend and I haven't called her back in FOR-EV-ER! She asked me where I had been all this time...and if she had missed anything interesting in my life...so instead of giving her the everyday...no no nothing is new with me...just working and sleeping...you know same ol' same ol' I decided to spice up her life and tell her all about the day I met my future husband, Chris Evans!
(This is a fictional story...but if Chris reads it and wants to believe it is true...I'm not stopping him from fufilling this prophecy!)
So the day that you called me I was on my way back from work and I bumped into Chris Evans...like literally bumped into him. I was walking down the street putting a book in my bag and listening to my iPod which would explain why I didn't hear the flock of girls near me screaming "OH MY GOD CHRIS EVANS!" This was also the reason I didn't hear him say, "Whoa!" So I walked into him, dropped my book, fell to my knees and EVERYTHING else fell out of my bag. I bent down and picked up my things while I apologized profusely without even looking up into the face of the person I had just creamed! That's when I hear this amazingly sexy voice say, "Hey no problem, let me help you," and then a second voice, this one a lot deeper and raspier saying, "OK...everyone back away!" That’s when I looked up right into Chris Evans' beautiful blue eyes. When I first look at him all I could think was, "Oh my god I know him...shit where from? Syracuse, Home?? Shit shit shit" Then it hit me, I realized who it was and all I could utter was, "ughhee," in place of thanks!
He bent down picked up my book and asked, "Prep, huh? Good book?"
"Um...um....it's great actually...it's about a prep high school...It doesn't have much of a plot, but the idea is good...which is strange since it has no plot...God I'm so sorry I ran into you I am so scattered brained today and tired and I was trying to multitask…which apparently I cant do...and...I'm just so sorry...."
He laughed at me a lot...then said, "Hey…it's ok...I'm Chris...what’s your name?"
"Lee...no, no that's from my book...oh god...Beth...Beth...I'm Beth! I swear I'm not an idiot..." I continued to pick up the large amount of contents that was inside my bag and wondered to myself, "Why on earth did I need to carry so much stuff in my bag? This is just prolonging my utter embarrassment." I saw my Lactaid pills and tried to grab for them before he saw, but I was way too late.
"So...can't tolerate the Milk huh, no worries I can't either…hey since I knocked you over and all your stuff on the ground...can I make it up to you by grabbing some coffee...or a bite to eat or something, I feel terrible."
"Why do you feel terrible? I ran into you....it takes two to tango...well two to run into each other." I picked up my brush and reached for my sunglasses the same time as him, our hands touched and my face must have turned so red that it looked purple. He looked into my eyes and smiled, "exactly," he said,"it does take two to tango...and that's why I am apologizing too. So you wanna get out of the middle of the road…maybe go somewhere both of us aren't being gawked at? Or somewhere where we aren't having our picture taken?"
That's when I looked up and knew that this experience had gotten a lot more embarrassing as I saw the paparazzi that must have been following him for the last 3 blocks and realized that my embarrassing spill would probably be plastered all over the gossip mags..."wonderful, this just got a whole lot more public," I thought to myself. Well at least I could make a joke of it on my gossip blog! "Sure…please....I don't want to be more embarrassed than I already am....lets try to at least keep this incident contained to the United States, I know people in Europe! Ok...not really, but really I don't need London to know I am a klutz because then I will have nowhere to move to escape this embarrassment!" He Laughed...a hearty laugh, like he truly found me funny, and I thought I actually felt my face turning even redder!
A couple of weeks have passed since then...and that's where I have been...you know just hanging out at Chris' New York City apartment and building a meaningful relationship! It's awesome...he even solved my moving problem...I am just going to move into his old studio apartment that he no longer lives in....and get this...rent free too! Cause he loves me! :) Chris is awesome…I really recommend, next time you are walking down the street like a total moron and not looking where you are going…try and walk into a hot boy !!
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